Best Coming to Terms Songs
What are the best coming to terms songs?
There are many stages of grief, but eventually one comes to terms with the loss and accept it as a part of life. This does not mean we stop missing the person, simply that we have come to accept the loss. When selecting music for a funeral or memorial service, you might consider choosing a song that expresses these feelings as a way of helping mourners come to terms with their grief.
Choosing music that expresses various different emotions of the grief cycle is a way to help others. While depressing music might seem the most appropriate, and some should be played, there are other choices. Some of the best songs for this purpose have been listed below. For your convenience, we have compiled the songs in a playlist, making it easy for you to listen to a sample or purchase a song. Additional information about each song, including significant verses and choruses, is provided below the playlist.
Best Coming to Terms Songs
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As Tears Go By
This was one of the first songs written by Mick Jagger and Keith Richards and was one of the songs they performed (as the Rolling Stones) on their first appearance on the Ed Sullivan Show in 1966. The basics meaning of the song is of a grandfather watching his grandchildren play as he thinks about his life.
Significant Verse:
It is the evening of the day
I sit and watch the children play
Doin things I used to do
They think are new
I sit and watch
As tears go by
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Bring On The Rain
Jo Dee Messina sings this slow-to-medium tempoed country song with Tim McGraw. Although it is not specifically about overcoming a death, it talks about continuing on no matter what has happened. This idea is especially seen in the chorus which states, “Tomorrows another day / And I’m thirsty anyway / So bring on the rain.”
Significant Verse:
It’s almost like the hard times circle round
A couple drops and they all start coming down
Yeah, I might feel defeated,
I might hang my head
I might be barely breathing – but I’m not dead
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I Believe
Diamond Rio sings this song about love and loss. The singer is talking to a lost love who has died. More specifically, the song tells the person that, even though they are gone, at times it feels as if they are still together and that “And with all my heart I’m sure we’re closer than we ever were, / I don’t have to hear or see I’ve got all the proof I need. / There are more than angels watching over me.”
Chorus:
I believe
That when you die your life goes on
It doesn’t end here when you’re gone
Every soul is filled with light
It never ends and if I’m right
Our love can even reach across eternity
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I Would’ve Loved You Anyway
This song is performed by Trisha Yearwood. It is a very beautiful song that talks about how she would have loved the person anyway despite the feelings of heartache that she’s experiencing. It would be appropriate for almost any funeral of a loved one since it contains no specific reference to a loved one. One of the best lines in the song is “And even if I’d seen it coming / You’d still’ve seen me running / Straight into your arms”
Chorus:
I would’ve loved you anyway
I’d do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I’d have loved you anyway
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Let it Be
“Let it Be” was written by Paul McCartney and part of the last album the Beatles released before breaking up. The phrase “mother Mary” is often misinterpreted to mean Mary, the mother of Jesus Christ. However, McCartney is actually referring to his own mother, who was also named Mary, who died when he was only 14. This song was played at Linda McCartney’s funeral. Because the Beatles are one of the “online holdouts” who won’t allow their albums to be released online, the mp3 link to Paul McCartney’s solo versions.
Significant Verse:
When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
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My Heart will Go On
“My Heart Will Go On” was written for the movie Titanic and Celine Dion. Lyricist Will Jennings said that he “wrote everything from the point of view of a person of a great age looking back” on a great love story. It won the 1998 Oscar for Best Song.
Chorus:
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you’re here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on
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Raging Sea
Unlike most of Michael W. Smith’s songs, this one is not as secular. The song takes the tone of someone who has passed on. In the song, the speaker states that he’ll still be close as others continue on their journey.
Chorus:
And when your life is tossed and turning
And you’re on the raging sea
I’ll come and pull you from the water
Then you will know that you are free
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The End of the End
Paul McCartney wrote this song about how he wants to be remembered when he dies. It was inspired by a visit McCartney made to George Harrison, shortly before his death. According to McCartney, Harrison was upbeat and telling stories about their early days. Paul decided that was how he wanted to be remembered, with “jokes to be told and stories of old.” The song also talks about how life continues after death, “At the end of the end / It’s the start of a journey / To a much better place”
Chorus:
On the day that I die I’d like jokes to be told
And stories of old to be rolled out like carpets
That children have played on
And laid on while listening to stories of old
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The Dance
“The Dance” was written by Tony Arata and Henry Drysdale-Wood. It makes a statement that it is best not to know how things will end, because if you do then you may deprive yourself of certain experiences. It became a best seller for Garth Brooks. Unfortunately, Garth Brooks is what is known as an “online holdout” and his songs are not currently available from iTunes. So, country fans will have to purchase the entire album if they want to hear it–no downloads are available (except from sound-alikes which I don’t link to here).
Chorus:
How could I have known you’d ever say goodbye
And now I’m glad I didn’t know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I’d of had to miss the dance
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Try Not to Breathe
This R.E.M. song is about the last moments of a person’s life. The lyrics are the words of the dying person who is telling his/her family not to cry because he/she has lived a full life and is ready to pass on to the other side.
Significant Verse:
I will try not to breathe.
This decision is mine. I have lived a full life
And these are the eyes that I want you to remember.
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You’ll Never Walk Alone
This Rogers & Hammerstein song was originally written for the 1945 musical Carousel. It was sung in the original show by Christine Johnson. In the original musical, the song was sung to inspire a pregnant female character after the death of her husband. The song has been recorded by a number of artists including Elvis Presley, Judy Garland, Olivia Newton-John, Michael Crawford, and Johnny Cash.
Significant Lyrics:
Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Tho’ your dreams be tossed and blown.
Walk on, walk on
With hope in your heart
And you’ll never walk alone
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You’re Gone
Paul Williams wrote “You’re Gone” with Nashville songwriter Jon Vezner. According to Williams, the song is based on his own life events. The message of the song basically states that the singer is glad for the moments that were shared, even though that person is gone. According to Williams, Garth Brooks recorded but never released a version of the song. To date, the most popular version of the song is Diamond Rio’s.
Significant Lyrics:
And I bless the day I met you
And I thank God that He let you
Lay beside me for a moment that lives on
And the good news is I’m better
For the time we spent together
And the bad news is you’re gone
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A few other songs you might consider:
“For the Good Times” performed by Kris Kristofferson
Don’t look so sad, I know its over;
But life goes on and this old world will keep on turning.
Lets just be glad we had some time to spend together
There’s no need to watch the bridges that were burning.
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“I’ll See You Again” performed by Frank Sinatra
I’ll see you again whenever spring breaks through again.
Time may lie heavy between, but what has been, is past forgetting.
Your sweet memory across the years will come to me.
Though my world may go awry, in my heart ’twill ever lie,
Just the echo of a sigh, goodbye.
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“Let Him Fly” performed by Linda Eder
It’s not just pulling someone very near
It’s having faith instead of fear
You can’t hold someone back when his dream calls
Love is a hole that has no walls
Yes he may disappear
There’s no way to know
You take that chance
You let him go
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“Life is Eternal” performed by Carly Simon
And will I see you up in that heaven
In all it’s light will I know you’re there
Will we say the things that we never dared
If wishing makes it so
Won’t you let me know
That life is eternal
And love is immortal
And death is only a horizon
Life is eternal
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“Somewhere Down the Road” performed by Amy Grant or Faith Hill
Somewhere down the road
There’ll be answers to the questions
Somewhere down the road
Tho we cannot see it now
And somewhere down the road
You will find mighty arms reaching for you
And they will hold the answers at the end of the road
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“The Rose” performed by Bette Midler
It’s the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance
It’s the dream afraid of waking
that never takes the chance
It’s the one who won’t be taken
who cannot seem to give
and the soul afraid of dying
that never learns to live
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